Month: March 2015

Kyle Jenner Is Getting Up in Grown Folks’ Business

Wow, those Jenners and Kardashians. They are keeping my hands typing with their squabbles with strippers, rappers, and baby mamas.

However, I am never one to shy away from the tawdry.

Here’s the back story:

Chyna had a child for Tyga, who later left her to date a 17 year-old. The teen is Kylie, and she’s Chyna’s former best friend, Kim Kardashian’s sister.

Anyway, these “women” are sitting on their big injected butts and slinging dirt.

It all started so innocently with Blac Chyna posting a picture of a watch that Tyga gave her. Apparently, that watch was given to her back in the day, and Kylie wanted to remind her of that by posting that she is “CURRENTLY” the new chick.

Here’s the evidence on Twitter:

Did you see it? Kyle Jenner had to remind Chyna and the world that she is Stupidman’s woman. Now, I did like how she emphasized currently, because we all know this isn’t going to last. I sure hope that nice wrist adornment is a stopwatch too, because it won’t be long before Tyga says, “That’s it. Honey, I quit. I’m moving on.”

Women everywhere if you want to know the secret to a successful relationship with a rapper — simply don’t fall for them. Seriously, unless, you would like a blinged out watch, then don’t let me stop you.

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KIm Kardashian Caught Stealing!

So says Serbian pop star, Jelena Karleusa, who accuses Kim Kardashian of stealing her look. Since Kim is known for nothing, this is something. It’s not notable in the grand scheme of things, but Kim did lift up a finger to give the thumbs up to the thievery. That’s something. It is funny that she filed a lawsuit against Old Navy by using a woman, whom she thought looked like her. Now, what is she doing? Come on, baby!

Anyway, I guess what is good for the goose is not good for the gander.

Here’s the story:

According to the pop star, Kim stole everything from her bleached blonde hair to her clothes to her poses.  Judging by the pictures and Kim K liking Jelena’s picture on Facebook, I must agree. Here you can’t tell the two apart: Jalena is the woman in the center boxes

Jelena asks, “Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?” She even thinks someone in Kim’s camp is combing through her social media to steal her style. Well, if it is anything, I think Jelena wore it better.

I swear Jelena looks like the Sharon Stone’s character in Basic Instinct in this picture. I guess imitation is the greatest flattery.

Here is Kim trying to gobble up the look:

Here is Kim:

and Jalena:

Justin Bieber is Drinking Legal, Y’all!

Now, that he is 21 years and two weeks old. Yes, his birthday was at the beginning of the month, but the Biebs keeps pushing the party. Earlier today, he had a comedy roast in which celebs like Snoop Dog, Martha Stewart, Kevin Hart, and others took jabs on his joker lifestyle.

Naturally, he took it all in stride, then, Justin hops over to party central, Vegas with his paper cup in hand.

So ….

My question is why is Justin blowing up this 21 birthday, as if it’s something special? Seriously, he has been celebrating this birthday for two weeks straight.

Now, I must confess that I tried to celebrate my birthday for the whole month. It was my idea first, Justin, but the day after my birthday, I ran out of money and had to haul my butt back to work.

Okay, I digress. I was pondering over why 21 years of life was so party worthy for Biebs.

Well, 21 means you are of legal drinking age, and the law trusts you do be responsible in your drinking.

Translation: Drinking responsibly to Justin mostly means don’t spill the sizzurp. That’s that the purple drink that gets you leaning after a couple of ounces.

Of course, Justin isn’t seen in this picture with alcohol in hand. Maybe, he’s trying to surprise his liver and drink water. Well, time will tell. Party on, Biebs!

Justin Bieber

Anyhow,

Kathy Griffin Quits! Okay, This can get Interesting!

Kathy didn’t say much, but she tweeted she’s bowing out. Apparently, she’s not liking how nasty Fashion Police has gotten, and she doesn’t feel it fits her brand of humor. Oh, if that show’s walls could talk, but all we have is speculation.

How do we fill in the blanks?

My mind races, and then I realize not giving a care has worked wonders for me.

So, right or way off track — I immediately jump to casting.

We have Khloe Kardashian and Amber Rose’s feud overshadowing the show, and there does not seem to be any signs of intelligent life between those two.

Perhaps, Kathy knows the producers are salivating over this bodacious Booty Duo. Perhaps, they can’t make up their simple minds, so they are entertaining the thought of bringing them both on-board. We know it would be must see reality TV train wreck — to have both Amber and Khloe on the panel.  Meow!

So, Kathy must have debated to stay or to go? If she stayed, she would have to put herself into a drunken stupor in order to avoid listening to the Booty Duo try to talk and breathe at the same time. Sadly, she chose her health. That’s the story. You heard it here first!

Round Two! Amber and Khloe Fight for Fashion Police!

Wow, these two are now duking it out for a J-O-B! Well, it’s not any gig, it’s to be a commentator on Fashion Police. Some time ago, Khloe Kardashian was asked to do the show, but she turned it down.

Flash forward — Kelly Osbourn quits and a slot is magically available. Names are tossed out and Amber is one of them and so is Khloe.

Hold up — wait a minute!

The thirst gets real.

Now, that Amber is in the running, rumor has it that Khloe is saying she’ll work on the show for free. OMG! Who does that?

A rich witch, I’ll tell you.

Really, Khloe? You had your stab at this gig, but you didn’t want it. Initially, you said it didn’t pay enough coins — now, you want to work for free?

Look, is clear what this is about — Big Booty Revenge.

Somehow, Khloe got butt hurt, because Amber Rose called out her sisters, Kylie and Kim.

Amber won those battles. Now, it’s personal; I guess.

Who can forget that the Kardashian’s signed that $80 to $100 million contract, Khloe doesn’t need the job, but that gig would mean a whole lot to Amber. Plus, Khloe had her chance at hosting a show with the X Factor, and she bombed. MISERABLY!

If the Powers That Be are listening — hear this:

Amber Rose needs a shot. She needs a come-up!

My goodness, Khloe is like that one crazy wheel on a grocery cart that needs to stay in its lane.

Congratulations to Chris Brown! He’s a daddy!

I guess it is all good. He’s the proud father of a nine-month old baby girl. Who would have figured he would be the paternal type. I figure time will tell. The mother is a mystery, but apparently they knew each other for years. I wonder does this cutie have a celeb name?

Hmmm.. I see Chris. I see a baby. I see similarities but really?

I guess he’s like that dress, and I can’t see that he is suppose to look exactly like a dad.

0303-chris-brown-w-babya-4

Okay, this is the blue, black, white, gold dress that burned the internet!

For two days, the Internet has become obsessed with the color of a dress. The picture went viral all over the Web, as people have two very different reactions. Even celebs such as Kim Kardashian and Julianne Moore are asking their followers to settle this score. Some immediately see the dress as black and blue. Other see it as white and gold. LNoel sees it as black and blue, but what do I know?

I will say that it is the dress in the middle that you need to focus on, but the link will have the picture that set off this great debate.

Okay, if you’ve been living under a rock, here is the dress that melted the internet in a storefront!

What do you think? Some saw the dress on the left and others saw the one in the middle.

As I said, the link will show you what started it all.

Thankfully, someone can settle all of this.

http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2015/02/28/science/white-or-blue-dress.html?_r=1